Non SW short story- Aliens: Progeny

[kivaanzion]

Update : May 5th, '06

I have received permission from Master Tanthos to provide a link to my story here (Many thanks Master Tanthos).

However I must first warn the group. This story is set in the "Aliens" universe. For anyone not aware- The "Alien" series of movies is a sci-fi/horror genre.

The story is not meant for younglings. It contains coarse language, graphic violence, and adult situations. Anyone easily offended by this should steer clear.

But if this doesn't bother you, and you are looking for something a little different, I hope you will please enjoy my story:

Aliens: Progeny

By the way- this is not the final draft. I am always trying to expand the story so that it reaches novella and (hopefully) novel length. I had some brainstorms this week and will probably be updating my story over the next couple of weeks.

I would be pleased to hear any comments you may have. If you fancy yourself a writer, and can provide some constructive criticism, it would be welcome as well. I would also be happy to answer any questions you may have.

Thank you all!

Kevin




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To Jedi Mom or Schph:

I've written a short story set in the "Aliens" series universe roughly 8 pages or so that I wish to share with the group.

I would like to link it here from my website, however the story is not meant for younglings- it contains coarse language, and scenes of graphic violence (hey Aliens was horror/sci-fi after all ).

So I would like to get permission first. As an alternative, I could post it here, with an edited PG-13 version (just the naughty words- the violence stays however ).

[Leda EmBorr]

I'm linking this question to the Council.....

[kivaanzion]

Thank you Leda.

I await their answer.

PS- should they wish to "screen" it, I can provide them with the link.

[Schph Gochi]

Not that I personally am uber sensitive.....I have taught many truck drivers how to speak....

But the one thing that we must all remember is that these boards are visible to children of all ages....and any "coarse" language should be cleaned up...

Violence...that is yet another question....if the kids know Star Wars....they know violence..to a degree...I have always been grateful that GL did not overuse violence and blood and guts.....and I am sure the level of violence they deal with in their video games would put our stuff to shame....

Thinking in terms of Jedi....and how violence is the last resort that we want to take......

[kivaanzion]

Just a "bump".

[Leda EmBorr]

I love your story, Ki Vaan.... It's vivid and creepy and suspenseful.... I don't think you need to change it at all--- It's just right.


I had a nice little SW/vampire fanfic and it was short... like yours. Then I tried to make it longer and it got so huge that now I don't know what to do with it... I changed it so much I forgot what I had before (I forgot to save an unchanged copy), It won't end!

[kivaanzion]

Thank you Master Leda. ;D

I feel it needs a teensy bit more exposition on the description of the alien life cycle- just so a reader not familiar with the Alien series of films isn't lost.

However I do know what you mean about making changes and saving drafts. Some ideas I have (that would take place in the second act) will make it necessary to alter the climax slightly- not too sure if I want to go through with that.